Sarah Wildish - A biography

Following the results of my DNA analysis, the most number of DNA matches I have had are on my maternal side, through my great great grandparents George Milgate and Sarah Wildish and their ancestors. I have found several new cousins descended through this line which has spiked my interest in trying to further Sarah’s story.

Sarah is intriguing, as will be revealed throughout her biography. Her death certificate lists her as Sarah Hayward otherwise Millgate. When asked about her, my grandfather knew her as Sarah Hayward and knew nothing of the name Millgate when we asked him. So, who was Mr Hayward and what happened to her marriage with George Millgate?

As with all family history, I started with the information which was known to the family. The information that I knew was that in the later years of her life she lived with her daughter Susan in Fulham. We also held a photocopy of a photo which is well known with her descendants family - that of her and her four daughters.

From left to right Ellen, Elizabeth, Ada, Susan Ann.

Seated Sarah

A family story attributed to Sarah is that she pawned her daughter Susan’s wedding dress preventing her from wearing it on her wedding day and needing to find a substitute. This has always baffled me - what sort of mother would do that to her daughter.

(Right - Herbert Stephen Rogers and Susan Ann Milgate on their wedding day in 1902).

Sarah's story

Sarah Wildish was born on 9 July 1857 to George Wildish and Mary Ann Jarrett in Upchurch, Kent. She was the eldest daughter and second of eight children. Both parents had previously been married before and already had children, providing Sarah with other older half brothers and sisters. She died on 6 December 1948 aged 91.

Sarah was baptised on 27 July 1857 at St Mary's Upchurch, Kent. George was listed as a labourer.

In 1861, the census tells us that the Sarah was living with her family were living at Chaffes Place, Upchurch. There were two half siblings William Payne and Elizabeth, along with her parents and other siblings George (Jr), Sarah, John and Charles. By 1871, Reuben, Susan, Ann and Edward had been born.

Sarah married George Millgate on 14 February 1874 at the Register Office in Milton, Kent.

(Note - the spelling of Millgate seems interchangeable with Milgate) depending upon the source of the record)

By the 1881 census they had five children, Elizabeth Ann, Ernest George, Ellen, Ada Annie and Susan Ann (my great grandmother). At the time of the census, they lived at 2 Pemberton Cottages, Newington near Rainham, Kent.

By 1891, things are a little different, George Milgate is found living in Rainham, with Elizabeth, Ellen, Ada, Annie (Susan) and another son John but there is no sign of Sarah anywhere. George is still listed as married. Ernest George at this time is staying with his grandparents George and Mary Wildish. One first thought is that Sarah is visiting another house at the time of the census, however initial searching does not produce any results.

Not being able to find Sarah immediately in the 1891 census, I moved onto the 1901 census and this does provide a result. In 1901, Sarah can be found living at 80 Wellington Street, Lower Holloway, London. However, she is listed as Sarah Hayward not Milgate. She is listed as being married to Harry Hayward, a house decorator and painter from Suffolk. So how do I know this is my ancestor? She is living with her children, Ellen, Annie, John and a grandson Albert. Also living at the house are a number of boarders including Herbert Stephen Rogers who would in 1902 marry my great grandmother, Susan. Her other daughter Ada is also listed as a visitor with her husband Alfred Putterill. This is a crucial document as it places so many of her family together that there is no doubt that this the correct record.

So this starts to generate many questions….

1. Why is Sarah not with her family in 1891?

2. Who is Harry Hayward and how did they meet?

3. Why are they indicating that they are married?

4. Where is her husband George Milgate in 1901?

To answer the last question first – a search of the 1901 census in Kent, shows George is still alive, still living in Rainham, as a boarder in Shakespeare Road, not far from his previous address. Interestingly, the census enumerator originally recorded him as single, but overwrote this as married. This is also still the case in the 1911 census where George is listed still as being married (for 35 years) having six children, all of which are still alive and living in Moore Street in Rainham. George eventually dies on 30 May 1920 of a cerebral haemorrhage and is buried in the parish church at Rainham on the 3 June 1920.

There is a still much information to try to find for Sarah at this point between 1901 and 1948 when she died. She also still needs to be found in the 1891 census and the 1911 census.

The next logical place to search for her is 1911 presumably still with Harry Hayward. This was quite a difficult task, as will become clear. After many many searches, the following record was found of a family living at 110 Palmerston Road in Islington.

H Hayward (Head), A Hayward (Wife), B Milgate (Daughter in Law) and K Miller (boarder)

H[arry] Hayward is listed as an out of work house painter from Suffolk. Intriguingly, A Hayward is listed as being married for 30 years and having five children. This contradicts the information found on George’s 1911 census record. However, it is the appearance of “B Milgate” daughter in law which seems to tie it together. This would tie in to a lady called Beatrice who I believe married John Milgate in Islington in 1904. It is not clear at this stage who K Miller is either.

It is not clear why only first initials were used in this census - is it because they were trying to hid their identity?

The provision of an address allows then for the search of the London Electoral registers for the time. Although it should be noted that Palmerston Road changed its name to Playford Road by 1917. The electoral registers provide interesting results. From the records found in the electoral registers a Harry and Amy Hayward are living at 110 Playford Road together until Harry’s death in 1927. At this point it is unclear as to why the name Amy is recorded rather than Sarah, however it is this discovery that has led me to find her appearance in the census records for 1891, which I have been searching for since the beginning.

In 1891 census a Harry and Amy Hayland [listed as "Hagland" on Ancestry.co.uk and "Hayland" on Find My Past) are living at 35 Market Street, Islington. Harry is listed as a Drayman at a Brewery born in Suffolk and Amy born in Upchurch in Kent. They are listed as married. The similarities lead me to believe this is in fact Sarah.

Harry sadly passed away on 24 July 1927 and was buried on 28 July 1927 at the burial ground in Finchley, he was 82. If we calculate that he lived with Sarah since 1891, it means that they lived together for at least 36 years, much longer than she lived with George Milgate (up to 17 years). It is still unclear as to how Harry and Sarah met. Did they know each other in Kent or had Sarah left Kent and moved to London before she met Harry.

So what happens to Sarah after Harry has passed away? The electoral registers available show that she carried on living at Playford Road until at least 1930. Family knowledge is that she moved in with her daughter Susan Ann who lived in Fulham. Susan was a widow, having lost her husband Herbert in 1924 when he was taken ill on a bus and died on the way to West London Hospital.

The next record found is the 1939 register which shows Sarah living in Chaul End, Luton in Bedfordshire. Presumably the family may have moved out of London due to the war. The household consists of Susan, her daughter, Joan her great granddaughter, a William Douglas (who is the father of Alice Douglas, Susan’s daughter in law) and an unknown person (the record is currently redacted).

Interestingly, William Douglas is also listed as a paper hanger, so I wonder if there was some business connection between him and the late Harry Hayward – of course this could just be a coincidence.

As Sarah approaches the end of her life, I know she went to live back in Fulham with Susan. However, I have not yet spotted her on any electoral registers, she died on 6 December 1948. She was buried in Brompton Cemetery,

Her obituary, published in the Fulham Chronicle on 31 December 1948 gives a little more information than was known previously.

Suddenly this lady who was always associated with leaving her children behind in the 1890s was very ‘fond of children’, it turns out fostered many more. An occupation which was always known to have been undertaken by her daughter Susan. This kind account of her character portrays her as an avid reader, knitter and active in the community. My grandfather’s memory of Sarah at her house is with a row of highchairs feeding several children.

It is because of the recent contact through Ancestry who is researching on behalf of someone whose mother had been fostered by Sarah in the 1920s that has helped tie all this information together.

The Wildish genes are now spread across the world due to the emigration of descendants. The name Wildish means “of the Weald”, coming specifically from the Kent area. Interestingly, of the 264 “close” cousins (4th cousin or less) which I have matched with my DNA through Ancestry.co.uk, 36 so far has been linked to the Wildish line both directly through Sarah Wildish and through her ancestors.

Do you have an ancestor that you are missing key information for - if you have read this story and want to ask for assistance or advice in where else to look - please contact me at rmancestry@mail.com

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Census citations

1861 - Class: RG9; Piece: 529; Folio: 216; Page: 3;

1871 - Class: RG10; Piece: 984; Folio: 130; Page: 21

1881 - Class: RG11; Piece: 974; Folio: 61; Page: 16

1891 - Class: RG12; Piece: 160; Folio: 81; Page: 15; (Sarah and Harry)

1891 - Class: RG12; Piece: 717; Folio: 120; Page: 10 (George)

1901 - Class: RG13; Piece: 175; Folio: 19; Page: 29 (Sarah and Harry)

1901 - Class: RG13; Piece: 808; Folio: 100; Page: 28 (George)

1911 - Class: RG14: 10/832/447 (Sarah and Harry)

1911 - Class: RG14: 61/4431/152